February 4, 2010

I lie awake in bed this morning tossing and turning, unable to sleep yet again. I decided to start a blog so our family and friends could join us on this amazing and challenging journey of life. It has been filled with countless ups and downs. As with any parent, you never imagine the thought of having to bury your child. February 22, 2009 sweet Haylee Mariah was placed in our arms and brought joy and love to us beyond measure. April 13, 2009 we gave her back to Our Heavenly Father. Somehow with the Lord as my strength, and several incredible friends by my side (Jessica, Jen, Brandy, Alicia, Mom... and of course my wonderful husband), I am still here to talk about it. There were several times I didn't think I could possibly endure one more sorrow filled day, and frankly I didn't want to. We are coming up on what would be Haylee's first birthday. At the suggestion of a sweet friend, Jen, and the encouragement of some other SIDS moms, we have decided to make her birthday a joyous occasion at the "most magical place on earth". Rylee can hardly wait!! We are bracing down and preparing our hearts for what we expect to be an emotionally overwhelming day. I am amazed at where we were last year, and how far we have come.
Haylee has taught us so many of life's most important lessons....
To fully and completely love and trust in God, To judge less and accept more, To treat each day as a gift, To appreciate every sunrise, That it's okay to take a moment to stop and marvel at the loveliness of a butterfly, To see beyond stereotypes to the inherent beauty of every living being, To appreciate my sweet Rylee and the song in her laughter, To enjoy sunsets, To see bunnies in the clouds, The true meaning of sorrow and utter despair, To see laughter in the eyes of a child, To care what happens to others, What it means to have a family, To protect earth, How to accept and cherish the life given to me, The importance of education, To pray, To love more, To appreciate beauty wherever I find it. To be humble, To watch the stars, To never ever take ANYTHING for granted, That there is an eternity....
Your life was not wasted precious angel....
We have learned so much from you...